day 5 AD

hmm, oredy 5 days after tat day.. bz wit the work loadS, replacement classeS, tests, excursion.. therefore, not much time to think bout the incident..in addition to that my laptop oso giving my a hard time.. haih.. still feeling so stressful le..

finally i found a new hp tat i wish to hv d.. C702, although it is not a new released hp, but i like it, its funtions met my expectations..it price is oso considerable, though it exceeded my budget la.. but i will work hard for it.. not wat we normally say for comforting ourselves, but really as wat its literal meaning- "work hard", cz my savings is very low d.. since Dec 08 when i din work for 1 month.. n Jan 09 i din hv any savings.. haih.. so now, i m starting to save money for it!! approximately RM750++ n i hv target to reach tis ammount by end of May..still hv 3 months to go.. though i set the date a little earlier than i can actually reach the ammount, but i guess i jus hv to do it.. bcz i need a new hp!!! not tat i m switching to a new hp or jus hv another new 1, but as it literally meant "i need a new hp"..

wish i can accomplish tis small little goal i hv for tis moment (aside from wat the big goal is - my studies!)..


GAMBATEH~~~!!!
U CAN DO IT~~~!!!
U MUS DO IT.. ANYWAY..
haha.. q(^_^)p

i wish i could say "8 661153 7"

ur personal msg..
ur sms..
wat u replied me..
everything...
wat u said..

all these..

although it may meant wat it really wana meant,
or mayb it us meant nthg..
but it is so significant to me..

although it mayb a joke of urs,
or it mayb the truth u r trying to tell me..

i don noe..
i really don noe...

i dono when u r kidding
and when u r being serious..

the only thing i can say is,
i trusted u..

but sometimes, i dono i shud or not..
whether to believe wat u said to me..


it may bcz of my feelings for u,
that make me to become so uncertain..
sometimes..


i m being so naive that,
now...
u hv turn my world upside down..

i dono i shud regret for it or not...

i wish i will not regret..
4494 99.9444866655 7~~

but,
u hv hurt me so much n so deeply..
that sometimes,
8 282266 8 33397993 22116
"8 661153 7"



because......

~* 8 99.94443 7 *~

Christmas of 2008..usual yet sweet

hmm, din celebrate christmas tis year (actually is a few years d..haha) well, jus stay at home as usual, repeat wat i do for this few weeks - sleep, eat, tv, stare at computer, dreamming n of cz house chores..

but i did go out yesterday, christmas eve..not countdown or anyhting but jus yumcha wit a gang of frens at mamak..craps a lot of things but i m the one who is the quite 1, sit n listen..n being the "cinderella" among them, i need to reach home b4 12, so we leave b4 midnight..haih, miss the chance to countdown wit them..

1 thing...to my surprise, i received a small present from some1..my "belated birthday present a.k.a. christmas present"..wow, for years, i don receive christmas presents d..really a surprise..very happy n touching~~~(especially the present is from him..haha =p) it is a dark chocolate, my favorite!! thxz la, 5333... q(^_^)p

p/s: 5333, 8 225899.99 998.883 7, 666 547225 7

blur? or jus running away?

hmm, so long din blog here lo..
well, feeling "a weird feel", so come here to blog it as this blog is almost no1 noe tat it exist..
hmm, the "weird feel" tat i m saying is tat i think i hv special feelings towards some1..hmm, wats wrong wit tat??it is normal..well, wats wrong is tat he has gf d..although she is currently studying abroad but it is not good to become the 3rd party..n i don wish to become the 3rd party..
but, on the other hand, though i m feeling bad for it, to say it honestly, i like him!! n deeper the feelings has become as days goes by..seeing him for almost everyday.. now i even feel uneasy or "weird" when i din see him for jus 1 day today.. n to say it honestly, i hv fall for him, without even i notice since when it started..
hmm, yesterday, u told me u r down, stg is bothering u..stg bout relationship..u n ur gf..it almost break the barrier i set for myslef to control my feelings towards u..luckily, i still can hold myself up..
today, u come n discuss wit me tat others r talking bout wat i wrote in my blog..u told me tat if anything happens, i can always tell u..n told me u oso like me, but we hv a limit..well, we can still b like b4 n tats wat i hope for..bcz i noe, u n i wont become couple,cz u hv gf d..
but i m really happy tat we can tell each other how we feel n still settle it calmly..thank you very much tat u still promise to look after me..i wish tat everything will go jus fine without any1 getting hurt..tats wat both of us really hope for.. ^^

illusion or real?

hmm, last night chat wit ah lun..he told me tat if i cant control myself, no1 can help me..i noe it is true.. ok, kelvin is a very nice guy..he treat me very good..but he treat other gals good too..he is so famous..surrounded by gals..lun say his 7th sense told him tat he likes me..hmm, i dono.....n i like him...hmm, i think so....but i m scared..i m afraid tat it is jus an illusion..n all of tis is jus i m thinking too much...jus like henry always ask me not to think too much..i don1 tat the history repeat again.. today, Dick told me tat he saw Kelvin n a gal go pasar malam together..he not sure she is his gf anot..ok, i mus at least create a gap between kelvin n i..i m not selfish, mayb she is not his gf..but, i jus wan to protect my heart, my feelings..i don wish to get hurt..as i not yet fully recover from the past experience..kelvin is a nice guy, n i don1 to lost him as a fren jus bcz i m thinking too much.. i really cherish our current relationship even though we jus noe each other for bout 1 month only..not too close but yet hv many things to share..i really like him..but i mus control my feelings..I MUST!! i can do it..! until then, i wish everything goes as i hope.. *wink ~_^ *

is it fading??

the feeling for you, the memories with you, are they fading already?? i felt that when i think of you now, nothing come to my mind.. was it because of my mind is resisting and rejecting you?? or was it because that i am free-ing myself from you?? haih...so blur... now, stg is goin wrong with me.. i think i began to felt for another guy.. he is a good and nice guy.. caring person.. i don't dare to hope that he will have feels for me too.. the more you hope, the more disappointed you will get.. haih, whatever la... just let it be.. if it is mine, then it will come to me.. i don't want to care so much already.. just let the faith decide for me..